Christmas Eve

It's 9pm.
Nothing's wrapped.
Nothing's unpacked.
I've got no help.

I feel so alone................

Christmas

After agonizing for several months, I decided that this Christmas, everything was going to be different. Different tree (flocked, never had one before), new lights, new ornaments, new decorations - everything. Why? Because things just aren't the same as they used to be, that's why.

And "they" decided that the tree topper needed to be retired, too.

So this year, white tree, blue lights inside and out, lit candy canes in the front yard, blue ornaments of different shades and red garland. So far, they like the changes

Well, almost everything gets changed. I think their stockings are going to be the same because they were hand made by their grandmother. I hadn't really given this much thought till yesterday when I opened the only Christmas storage box I'll probably ever use (There are about a dozen that will never see the light of day again). It had the tree skirt - also made by the grandmother - and the stockings.

I almost lost it when I found hers. Wasn't ready for that.

I still have to find the cookie plate for Santa. Hopefully, it's in this box.

Now, what do I do with hundreds and hundreds of ornaments I'll never use again?

This is for you

No, not you, or you or you.

But just for you.


If Ihad my way,
if it were up to me,
I'd know what to say and how to say it.
I'd know what to feel
and when to feel it.
And I could say all those things
That I've been holding inside.